31- 03- 2009  

hmm.. what a pleasant morning 2day.. i went 4 breakfast wiz dad and had a nice chat wiz him abt how he maganges and makes strategic decisions 4 companies.. yeah my dad is not only a lawyer, but a strategist, yes, daddy is my Zhuge Liang ^^ and my mom is somewhat like... errm.. CaoCao?? ahahaha can not be lah xD but somewhat alike... 2 certain extent...


After that, we met up wiz some ppl juz 2 ask abt my study in Japan, and ya, things become much more better, at least we found out that the school fee isn't that expensive and it doesn't seem 2 be difficult 4 me to go there.. the only thing 2 be worried now is the paper world =.= man, i've nvr graduated frm highschool in vietnam.. i only hav one pathetic secondary school cert... and diploma, and adv dip, and a bachelor degree in the near future.. heard that the Jap. ppl r a bit systematic.. kinda step-by-step basis... dunno leh.. hopefully everything can go smoothly and i could go 2 the school that i like..

Anyway.. i've been back vietnam for like 4 days.. and literally stuck at home for 4 days.. playing titan quest =.= nad my mom can't stop singing =.= apparently she discovered some online karaoke site and has been whole-heartedly pouring her soul out with nearly 200 songs over the past 2 weeks... scary.. my mom is seriously scary =.=

27- 03- 2009  

Only a few more hours.. and my chains will be gone once again, be temporarily free from exams and assignments for 2 wks =.= i still haven't finished my project though, but i'm confidence that i can defeat this monster on time, only that i'll have 2 sacrifice my precious, peaceful sleeping hours :( didn't hav a single decent sleep this week... due to exams and my lack of discipline =.= yeah i can play games for one day straight but sorry, not study...


Just spent hours tidying my room yesterday and now it has become some extraordinary messy mess again T___T why ah? i've been throwing away loads of things & tried to organize the stuffs that are lucky enough to coninue habitating in my room...

Okay break time is over... better get back to the project again b4 things become too late xD lol luckily i hav 2 laptops if not then i'll stuck at this gaming machine 4ever~~ yeah this laptop is such a great, big, fat distraction that solely exist in my room.. haiz~~~

25- 03- 2009  

This morning while sitting at the bus stop, i listened the song "Jesus" by Robert Pierre and i felt like crying... yeah i was so depressed recently.. stressed wiz guilt & regret.. coz seriously i really has no idea in USM as all.. I didn't like the lecturer and nvr went 2 class.. so i ended up having an empty notebook.. well, not really empty coz i was drawing all the time during my rare hours sitting in class =.= the subject isn't easy at all, yup it's difficult & looooong... and wad i know is a few simple concepts inside that 500+ pages txtbk.. talked 2 Btp for hrs ytd and tried 2 dump as much things into my sorry brain as possible, but it seemed fruitless.. then i prayed & felt God's present...

God, I thank you again for helping me with my exams today. Even though i didn't manage to complete the paper on time, but I can say that i did really well, much more better than i expected. And who ever expects that BCG would come out o.0 ? I didn't study BCG, actually.. because it's the topic that I've already mastered 2 yrs ago :) I messed up the DPM part though.. but nvm.. i dun care already ^^ i know God was there wiz me in the exam hall and i know i'll pass this paper, that's enough already :)

I'm supposed 2 buy the external HDD 4 dad 2day.. and haven't eaten anything since morning too... arg~ why it has 2 rain at this time.. will i got stuck by thunder if i went out now? it seems like a thunderstorm now... not juz a normal shower... and I still hav 2 do my project also.. must submit by tmr and i juz finish like 10% of it.. Nooo~ not this weather, pls.. it's raining now, my favourite weather.. nice 2 sleep, goes well wiz hot food and superb while gaming!!! arg~~ how hard it can be, to defeat temptation T___T

And yay it's my 100th post~~ yeah~~ haven't really maintain any blog as good as this one ^^ okay, keep this up, Sunny ^^

Jesus - Robert Pierre  


I’m blown away this life of faith
It’s filled with endless blessing
And yet sometimes I wake to find
I’m facing trials and testing

Even in the moment
When I’m falling to my knees
I find that help is waiting for me

Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus

All my concerns my deepest hurt
My Savior’s been where I am
Life comes undone and there’s no one
Who understands like He can

So even if I stumble and my world is torn apart
There is One who’s holding my heart

Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus

My God hears
And He draws near

Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus

Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus

Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus

Made to Love - Toby Mac  


The dream is fading, now I'm staring at the door
I know its over cause my feet have hit the cold floor
Check my reflection, I ain't feelin what I see
It's no mystery
Whatever happened to a passion I could live for
What became of the flame that made me feel more
And when did I forget that...

I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you

The dream's alive with my eyes opened wide
Back in the ring you've got me swinging for the grand prize
I feel the haters spittin vapors on my dreams
But I still believe
I'm reachin out, reachin up, reachin over
I feel a breeze cover me called Jehovah
And daddy I'm on my way
Cause I was made to love...

I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you

I was made to love you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you

(nah, nah, nah, nah - nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah - nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)

Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it all away (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)

Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it all away (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)

Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it, I'd give it all away, Oh yeah

Cause I was made to love you (I was made to love you)
Yeah I was made to love you (I was made to find you)
Cause I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you) (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you)
Cause I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you) (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
I was made to love you (I was made to adore you)

Yeah I'm loved by you
Yeah I'm loved by you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Yeah I' m loved by you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)

23- 03- 2009  

I dare say that i've been good for the past few days.. still lazy here and there and couldn't stop playing games sometimes but ya, i'm still good generally :) i got study, ok~ not much but i know i did put effort at the last moment.. few hours b4 exams, haha... i spend more time with God, too, in which i realize on how much an ass i was during the past few weeks =.= i do more useful things, be more careful wiz my mouth when i try to speak out, and got addicted wiz the bible study podcast :) yeah it's a big improvement, i listened to a number of sermons daily, the ones that i've downloaded and stuffed inside my ipod for so long without remember of their existences...

Yup my EC paper rocks xD i did surprisingly well and ya i didn't know i could write so much and hopefull so correct, too xD.. hmm can not be so wrong lor, i know wad i was writting abt, i hav enough experience and knowledge in the computer field to complete my paper, i know i didn't get lost :) and thanx God for the information i found on the internet this morning, it was relevant to my exam, too ^^ and could feel your present was there with me, in the exams hall... Thank you for answering my prayer, and for all the things that you did to me. Yeah i feel my world is back 2 normal again once i'm with u and thinking about u, Lord :) .

And yeah afer my exam i went to collect my airticket and the travel agent gave me tons of free stuffs ^^ hahaha it was so much fun, she juz walked to the bookshelf, pull out a big bag with these cute little toys and gave it too me ^^ yeah of course u can tell that i'm more than happy ^^ after that i went 4 lunch wiz Wlng.. haven't seen her 4 so long.. we had conversations over lunch and had dessert 2gether after that, too. What a pleasant day 2day ^^

...my mind was blooded wiz things to write but i'm so tired at the moment.. due 2 the lack of sleep... will continue soon after i recharge my battery =.=

18- 03- 2009  

Yay I'm back 2 S'pore at last. The trip was fun and a bit tiring, since we were basically dying on the plane everyday, from S'pore to Bangkok then to Vientiane then back 2 Thailand and to S'pore again.. I glad that I was able to make new friends, and seems that everybody who was there knew me.. yeah i've become famous instantly, after getting drunk at the party. My 1st time getting so drunk and I had vomitted everything, every where, frm the party, to the toilet, then the car and messed the whole hotel up =.= i'd never felt so embarrassed like that b4, having ppl carried me all the way back and take care of me, and my contact lens.. it was so humiliated =.= i heard frm P.Lng that the photos of me taken frm that night were pure retarded =.= God... i juz wan to hide in some corner and die there... And there was something with my attitude also. It took a 180 degree swing where i totally ignored people, and tried to be really haughty. Arrgg.. i dun know wad's become of me anymore, and now i think i'm having a reputation of being some bitchy, freaking proud princess. Sometimes I can't really control my own behavior, somehow it comes impulsively and i end up doing loads of stupid things.. And my demonstration sucks.. well, i don't feel like blaming ppl, perhaprs it's me who didn't perform well enough and we didn't rehearse at all, as my instrutor has strong faith on putting on spirit and things will just anyhow flow =.=


I got chance to speak Japanese, too, during my days in Vientiane, just to find out my Japanese sucks. Especially speaking. My listening is okay, able 2 catch up, since i watch anime every day.. but the speaking part.. really.. after all the years of learning the language, i only managed to produce some pieces of lame conversations, which all the simple yet grammatically wrong. Haiz.. really disappointed with myself.. in the end i'm half- assed in everything, i speak lame Chinese, my Japanese is still lousy and my English remains sucks. My Vietnamese starts to become weird, too.. Arg~~ may b i better go learn sign language bah~

Anyway, exepct the prolems occured here and there, it still can be considered a quite good trip, I managed to go shopping on my own without getting lost, and everything else seemed to move smoothly. The food was good, too and the trainings were interesting enough. Bangkok is as busy as ever and Vientiane is quite and peaceful. The whether in Vientiane was suprisingly nice, and the people are really sincere. At least i did enjoy myself ya..

12- 03- 2009  

Aiya,, how ah?? why recently so many bad things keep happening 2 me?? now i'm facing a great chance to reinstalling windows again...and now i'm on the edge of losing all my precious documents.. with tons of files scattering ard, another 20gb of music and all the software installed, seems that i hav to stay one whole night for this =.=


Then still hav friends problems.. Some ppl that hav almost lost in my memory now suddenly turned up.. yet some ppl who always there 4 me now start 2 disappear.. And my hand's injured again, badly that i thought it was broken or something.. and my internet's getting slower for no reason, too slow that i can't even check my emails, let alone complaining on my blog..

And my money problem's getting uglier again.. dad thought i still hav a few k in my saving that's y he was happily telling me 2 use that money 1st until he's back frm business trip.. yeah it's me who didn't dare 2 bring myself confessing 2 him that i've eaten all my money =.= now i dun hav a single cents in my bank accounts, all together..

Hopefully I'll b able 2 survive during my coming Thailand & Laos trip... Wondering what's waiting 4 me next... the only thing i know now is i'm definately having a loooooooong night 2nite...

06- 03- 2009  

Arrg dunno why i'm so unlucky recently =.= the aikido training yesterday was really good, and i was successfully avoided that morron but was so excited and over-confident when i tried to slam on shihonage.. so the result is my hand got injured badly.. can say it was terribly twisted =.= now i can't move or lift my hand up at all... so at the moment i just pray hard that it's not broken and will be able 2 recover soon. If not things would turn disaster since i'm having my trip to Laos & Thailand next week and my exams r coming soon.. since it's my left hand that got injured and i'm left-handed, it's pretty bad when it comes to daily activities..  i just realise i can still type relatively fast with one hand, thougth. may b use computer too much already, haha 

03- 03- 2009  

Arg~~ I'm doomed, man =.= i lost one of my earrings, somewhere in the dojo.. or worse it could be at the foodcourt.. so somebody has probably looted it.. well, that person should be lucky 2day, as my earrings are white gold.. and I'm the one with sappy luck T____T it was my fault, actually.. i was so careless anyhow toss the earrings like that.. argggg~ mom'll get angry 4 sure... But dunno why 2day so suay huh.. got 2 see that shit face while training again, only lucky enought that i managed to not practice with him at all.. but thing wasn't gotten any better juz because of that.. my performance 2day was lousy, too.. it's like self-making foul.. doing countless weird things, saying tons of weird stuffs also...


Arg~~ my earring... i kept looking at the stupid bag for hrs.. since i hav poor luck 2day, trying 2 search 4 it wasn't much avail. I guess miracles don't always happen.. haiz.. wad 2 do now is trying 2 get over it and move on T____T

01- 03- 2009  

Now as the encounter weekend's coming 2 an end, i didn't feel regret 4 coming at all, which was complete different frm wad i'm been thinking in the past few days. The feeling of being set free, being loved and protected by the Lord had somehow brought me out of depression and the fear i've been facing recently... And my mind has no longer flooded with all the negative thoughts.. At least at the moment...

The camp isn't bad, but i still have difficulties talking 2 ppl. So I'm here again, the playground in the salvation army's back yard.. not so many ppl come 2 this place, so i can relax here undisturbed.. i found myself getting attached to this place.. it's so quiet and peaceful.. only natural sounds can be heard, trees around... i have the feeling as if i belong here, yeah i really like nature, especially trees..

Haha it's not like i have to stay here any longer. I'll be home soon, yay~ finally, i can jump on my cozy bed and start playing computer again,.. haiz,, life really becomes so difficult and irritating without my computer.. yeah i'm computer addicted, but i dun care. Haven't been able 2 use computer for only 3 days and my fingers start getting itchy already.. luckily my handphone is still here with me so i can at least check my emails and do a bit of blogging.. Haven't blogged 4 quite sometimes.. yeah i've been busy recently with so many stuffs cramming at the same time.. and have been dealing with depression again, i kept getting worried abt my exams results, how on earth can the school mess up with my documents or wad am i going 2 do next, how can i survive during this final yr... anyway, worring won't make the situation any brighter.. may be i juz better start doing work and pray bah..