24- 02- 2008  

February 24,
2009

Why there are times when I'm so free and have no better thing to do beside wasting time doing nothing yet there are times when I feel myself being tied up with so much work until my brain wanna burst??? Like these recent week, while I'm already stressed my arse up with school stuffs, all sort of stupid problems start to show up.. and why of all time, thoose annoying ppl start to bug me non-stop??? My brain is gonna explored already... it's like adding oil to fire...


Knowing so well that I'll have a tight schedule this week, I try to set aside games and anime, trying to concentrate on my project. I was quite satisfied with myself at first, was so confident that i'll b able 2 finish the project on time and then BOOM~~~ hahaha it was just one small mistake, i was too careless to ready the error warning and click that stupid "Yes" button with ended up erasing all my essay, the stuff that i tried hard cracking my freakin' brain to come out with, is now gone... i tried performing file recovery but it doesn't seem to success. ..

Thank 2 Wlng who has prayed and encourage me on my study. Her words woke me up and I tried hard to discipline myself 2 b more concentrated... but i dunno wad to do already, i'm too headache, too tired of trying and the thought of trying to do the project all over again really freeze me to death.. Now I juz wanna jump on bed and shut everything down, i feel like quitting everything i'm doing/ supposed to do right now.. i really have no idea where the path i'm walking might lead me to.. i'm not even sure whether i can reach the destination or not~ whether i'll sucess, or die somewhere on the roadside T__T

God, I'm incapable of everything, what can i do now? will u be fed up after hearing all of my complain? 

----------------------------------------------

Yay~ while i was still busying complaining, anther problem came in.. haha i feel like going crazy now~~ Well, it's abt that problematic girl again, the one that i'm supposed to take care of. Err.. not really "supposed" to do, i did it voluntarily. It just because I felt sorry for her mom, who loves and cares so much yet the girl does nothing but live in her illogical fantasy. Somewhat like me, in the past. But at least my parents have the money to patch things up, and that at least my mind's okay enough so that it can support me to stand up again. With this girl, I don't know how to deal with her already, she's so much worse than me and i'm not sure whether i'm being used by them or not. I love to help people, but I used 2 be so gullible that in the end,everybody took me for granted.. Yeah may be i'm juz paranoid over the past.. and too desperated for a break..

I pray that things would turn around soon. Deep inside me I sense that all the problems that I've been going through are the trials that test me whether I'm worthy to be you child or not. I'll try to stand up and walk again so Jesus, please grant me the strength so that I can fight again. And please bless the girl, Lord. Bless her with your wisdom that she won't be blind by the devil, please clrear her eyes so that she'll be able to see the love from her devoted mother. Please use me to help them walk out of the situation. I believe that with you are here, things will turn out better and brighter. Amen & I'll wait for your answer, Lord.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, February 24, 2009 and is filed under . You can leave a response and follow any responses to this entry through the Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom) .

0 comments