I know that I’m not alone, and never be. Knowing that I’m always filled with love and definitely not lacking of any material things. Then why there are times when there’s an emptiness that doesn’t stop creeping all over me? I wonder where it has gone, the normal joyful and sunny side off me. Or is it because of the weather that I’ve turned out totally gloomy? I’m not sure whether it’s because weather can effect a person’s emotion, or perhaps I’m turned somewhat sensitive out off sudden? But want thing I know for sure is that my mood swings badly during heaty days, heh.
And why am I so busy out of sudden? Recently there's a restless feeling that overwhelms me and I'm stuck =.= or am really I become that emo???
Heh, didn't really write anything for so long, since i'm not patient enough waiting for the page to load =.= can't keep blaming the internet 4ever, though.
Didn't have school 2day so i decided to vistit an old friend who stayed in Lakeside. I felt more like a relative, acutally. Since We used 2 stay 2gether for relatively long and there was a time when i stayed at her house, too. Got to play with her kid again. Cute boy, seem that the future ahead of him will be bright and fruitful, or so, i pray :) Went to Boonlay after that to check out the new shopping mall. I haven't been there for like, a year? Everything changed.. the mall has grown so fast with tons of shops, and packed with people.. too overpopulated already. I got stuck everywhere i went :( My impulsive mode was set to default again, everytime i walk to the shopping mall. Got a levi's watch. Not a bad deal, at least I'm in need of a watch at the moment, since my baby-blue-turned-yellow casio watch was beyond wearable stage :(
Dunno why i'm so enthu in writing, recently. At least my 2nd story was good, I received numbers of reviews just a moment after publishing the story. Yeah, indeed the comments have lightened my mood significantly. Didn't know that i want attention that much, lol
What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed and filled," without giving them the things that needed for the body, what good is that? So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.
You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness
And I look to You
And I wait on You
I will sing to You, Lord
A hymn of love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
You are forever in my life
You see me through the seasons
Cover me with Your hand
And lead me in Your righteousness
And I look to You
And I wait on You
I will sing to You, Lord
A hymn of love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
I will sing to You, Lord
A hymn of love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
I will sing to You, Lord
A hymn of love
For Your faithfulness to me
I'm carried in everlasting arms
You'll never let me go
Through it all
Haven't really blogged for quite long.. i'm a bit lazy recently, since my works have been overloaded again. Thank God for helping me to find the school. I know i'll have tons of work to do if i want to get in that school. So please continue to help me, God. Give me your strength, your wisdom so that I'll be able 2 achieve my goal ~ using my brain in the way that will benefit your kingdom. And thank u so much for protecting me, and help me survive in school...
.:.
Recently I'm having the urge of writing fiction, which is utterly ridiculous. I never think my right brain does function correctly at all, even though i'm left- handed. Still give it a shot, though. At least it's a good way to improve my english :)
Starting to write my first fan fiction for D. Gray-Man now, haha. Still struggling with the title, though. And indeed my writing sucks >"<
.jpg)
You've had your taste of all that's sweet
Now you're through and what does it mean
You've sought the truth, found a lie
You've given up but it
doesn't make it right
You wanna go, I know you wanna leave
Ya' gotta go, farther than you see
If you just look past your scars
You will see it's not that far
Don't close your mind
Let God inside
Begin to breathe, Start to fly
Start to fly
Wake up from your sleep,
start your dream
It's okay to believe what you don't see
Give it away, your heart
won't break
This is a chance that you're
gonna have to take
You wanna go, I know you wanna leave
Ya' gotta go, farther than you see
If you just look past your scars
You will see it's not that far
Don't close your mind
Let God inside
Begin to breathe, Start to fly
Start to fly
Just close your eyes, hold on tight
You don't have to be afraid
He is with you all the time
You'll be free, full of peace
And everything that you need,
it is right there can't you see
If you just look past your scars
You will see it's not that far
Don't close your mind
Let God inside
Begin to breathe, Start to fly
Start to fly
If you just look past your scars
You will see it's not that far
Don't close your mind
Let God inside
Begin to breathe, Start to fly
Start to fly
If you just look past your scars
You will see it's not that far
Don't close your mind
Let God inside
Begin to breathe, Start to fly
Start to fly
Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?
Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. For by it the people of old received their commendation. By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible.
By faith Abel offered to God a more acceptable sacrifice than Cain, through which he was commended as righteouse, God commending him by accepting his gifts. And through his faith, though he died, he still speaks. By faith Enoch was taken up so that he should not see death, and he was not found, because God had taken him. Now before he was taken he was commended as having pleased God. And without faith it is impossible to please him, for whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him.
Recently I've been traveling nearly every month... Woot~
This is the pics frm my latest trip wiz dad& mom.. A mountainous city in Vietnam, Dalat.. no personal picture, though.. i hate showing my real face on the net.. juz to save my sorry soul frm any future trouble..
---------------------------------------------
---------------------------------------------
We went to Laos and Thailand for Aikido seminar and demonstration on March 2009. I didn't manage to talk picture in Bangkok, though... coz we were too tired... and apparently too occupied wiz shopping xD
--------------------------------------
Arg.. i'll b gone again in 5 days time... why does time pass so fast T___T still haven't really enjoyed my life yet ...hopefully i can fly back again 4 Yn's wedding.. not bcoz i like them or wad... i juz wanna spend more time wiz my family, haha... didn't know the aikido thing would b that expensive.. $450.. man.. that makes next month's expense shoot all the way to $1500 =.= either i won't eat or let daddy slowly kills me T__T
Anyway.. the trip 2 Dalat was awesome xD we went to several places and took loads of pictures... more than 400 pics on a holiday 2 a place that we've been countless times. and i finally got the cactus!!! yes!!, the cactus ^^ it looks quite skinny, though.. not sure whether the cactus can grow fatter if i water it everyday or not...
.:.
God, please bless me.. it seems that my default mode is haughly and i love acting like some aloof ass lately. I'm so sick of it and i dunno why i'm so paranoid now... I just pray that i won't do anything stupid or cause any further trouble... and pls help me 2 fix my character, lord =.= i always act without thinking and now ppl seem to think i'm having some attitude problems..
hmm.. what a pleasant morning 2day.. i went 4 breakfast wiz dad and had a nice chat wiz him abt how he maganges and makes strategic decisions 4 companies.. yeah my dad is not only a lawyer, but a strategist, yes, daddy is my Zhuge Liang ^^ and my mom is somewhat like... errm.. CaoCao?? ahahaha can not be lah xD but somewhat alike... 2 certain extent...
After that, we met up wiz some ppl juz 2 ask abt my study in Japan, and ya, things become much more better, at least we found out that the school fee isn't that expensive and it doesn't seem 2 be difficult 4 me to go there.. the only thing 2 be worried now is the paper world =.= man, i've nvr graduated frm highschool in vietnam.. i only hav one pathetic secondary school cert... and diploma, and adv dip, and a bachelor degree in the near future.. heard that the Jap. ppl r a bit systematic.. kinda step-by-step basis... dunno leh.. hopefully everything can go smoothly and i could go 2 the school that i like..
Anyway.. i've been back vietnam for like 4 days.. and literally stuck at home for 4 days.. playing titan quest =.= nad my mom can't stop singing =.= apparently she discovered some online karaoke site and has been whole-heartedly pouring her soul out with nearly 200 songs over the past 2 weeks... scary.. my mom is seriously scary =.=
Only a few more hours.. and my chains will be gone once again, be temporarily free from exams and assignments for 2 wks =.= i still haven't finished my project though, but i'm confidence that i can defeat this monster on time, only that i'll have 2 sacrifice my precious, peaceful sleeping hours :( didn't hav a single decent sleep this week... due to exams and my lack of discipline =.= yeah i can play games for one day straight but sorry, not study...
Just spent hours tidying my room yesterday and now it has become some extraordinary messy mess again T___T why ah? i've been throwing away loads of things & tried to organize the stuffs that are lucky enough to coninue habitating in my room...
Okay break time is over... better get back to the project again b4 things become too late xD lol luckily i hav 2 laptops if not then i'll stuck at this gaming machine 4ever~~ yeah this laptop is such a great, big, fat distraction that solely exist in my room.. haiz~~~
This morning while sitting at the bus stop, i listened the song "Jesus" by Robert Pierre and i felt like crying... yeah i was so depressed recently.. stressed wiz guilt & regret.. coz seriously i really has no idea in USM as all.. I didn't like the lecturer and nvr went 2 class.. so i ended up having an empty notebook.. well, not really empty coz i was drawing all the time during my rare hours sitting in class =.= the subject isn't easy at all, yup it's difficult & looooong... and wad i know is a few simple concepts inside that 500+ pages txtbk.. talked 2 Btp for hrs ytd and tried 2 dump as much things into my sorry brain as possible, but it seemed fruitless.. then i prayed & felt God's present...
I'm supposed 2 buy the external HDD 4 dad 2day.. and haven't eaten anything since morning too... arg~ why it has 2 rain at this time.. will i got stuck by thunder if i went out now? it seems like a thunderstorm now... not juz a normal shower... and I still hav 2 do my project also.. must submit by tmr and i juz finish like 10% of it.. Nooo~ not this weather, pls.. it's raining now, my favourite weather.. nice 2 sleep, goes well wiz hot food and superb while gaming!!! arg~~ how hard it can be, to defeat temptation T___T
And yay it's my 100th post~~ yeah~~ haven't really maintain any blog as good as this one ^^ okay, keep this up, Sunny ^^
I’m blown away this life of faith
It’s filled with endless blessing
And yet sometimes I wake to find
I’m facing trials and testing
Even in the moment
When I’m falling to my knees
I find that help is waiting for me
Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus
All my concerns my deepest hurt
My Savior’s been where I am
Life comes undone and there’s no one
Who understands like He can
So even if I stumble and my world is torn apart
There is One who’s holding my heart
Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus
My God hears
And He draws near
Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus
Any desperate day
One word I can pray
All I know to say - Jesus
Screaming from my soul
I’m giving up control
The only hope I know - Jesus
The dream is fading, now I'm staring at the door
I know its over cause my feet have hit the cold floor
Check my reflection, I ain't feelin what I see
It's no mystery
Whatever happened to a passion I could live for
What became of the flame that made me feel more
And when did I forget that...
I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you
The dream's alive with my eyes opened wide
Back in the ring you've got me swinging for the grand prize
I feel the haters spittin vapors on my dreams
But I still believe
I'm reachin out, reachin up, reachin over
I feel a breeze cover me called Jehovah
And daddy I'm on my way
Cause I was made to love...
I was made to love you
I was made to find you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you
I was made to love you
I was made just for you
Made to adore you
I was made to love
And be loved by you
You were here before me
You were waiting on me
And you said you'd keep me
Never would you leave me
I was made to love
and be loved by you
(nah, nah, nah, nah - nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah - nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it all away (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it all away (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Anything I would give up for you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Everything, I'd give it, I'd give it all away, Oh yeah
Cause I was made to love you (I was made to love you)
Yeah I was made to love you (I was made to find you)
Cause I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you) (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you)
Cause I was made to love you (I was made to adore you, made just for you) (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
I was made to love you (I was made to adore you)
Yeah I'm loved by you
Yeah I'm loved by you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
Yeah I' m loved by you (nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
(nah, nah, nah, nah, nah)
I dare say that i've been good for the past few days.. still lazy here and there and couldn't stop playing games sometimes but ya, i'm still good generally :) i got study, ok~ not much but i know i did put effort at the last moment.. few hours b4 exams, haha... i spend more time with God, too, in which i realize on how much an ass i was during the past few weeks =.= i do more useful things, be more careful wiz my mouth when i try to speak out, and got addicted wiz the bible study podcast :) yeah it's a big improvement, i listened to a number of sermons daily, the ones that i've downloaded and stuffed inside my ipod for so long without remember of their existences...
Yup my EC paper rocks xD i did surprisingly well and ya i didn't know i could write so much and hopefull so correct, too xD.. hmm can not be so wrong lor, i know wad i was writting abt, i hav enough experience and knowledge in the computer field to complete my paper, i know i didn't get lost :) and thanx God for the information i found on the internet this morning, it was relevant to my exam, too ^^ and could feel your present was there with me, in the exams hall... Thank you for answering my prayer, and for all the things that you did to me. Yeah i feel my world is back 2 normal again once i'm with u and thinking about u, Lord :) .
And yeah afer my exam i went to collect my airticket and the travel agent gave me tons of free stuffs ^^ hahaha it was so much fun, she juz walked to the bookshelf, pull out a big bag with these cute little toys and gave it too me ^^ yeah of course u can tell that i'm more than happy ^^ after that i went 4 lunch wiz Wlng.. haven't seen her 4 so long.. we had conversations over lunch and had dessert 2gether after that, too. What a pleasant day 2day ^^
...my mind was blooded wiz things to write but i'm so tired at the moment.. due 2 the lack of sleep... will continue soon after i recharge my battery =.=
Yay I'm back 2 S'pore at last. The trip was fun and a bit tiring, since we were basically dying on the plane everyday, from S'pore to Bangkok then to Vientiane then back 2 Thailand and to S'pore again.. I glad that I was able to make new friends, and seems that everybody who was there knew me.. yeah i've become famous instantly, after getting drunk at the party. My 1st time getting so drunk and I had vomitted everything, every where, frm the party, to the toilet, then the car and messed the whole hotel up =.= i'd never felt so embarrassed like that b4, having ppl carried me all the way back and take care of me, and my contact lens.. it was so humiliated =.= i heard frm P.Lng that the photos of me taken frm that night were pure retarded =.= God... i juz wan to hide in some corner and die there... And there was something with my attitude also. It took a 180 degree swing where i totally ignored people, and tried to be really haughty. Arrgg.. i dun know wad's become of me anymore, and now i think i'm having a reputation of being some bitchy, freaking proud princess. Sometimes I can't really control my own behavior, somehow it comes impulsively and i end up doing loads of stupid things.. And my demonstration sucks.. well, i don't feel like blaming ppl, perhaprs it's me who didn't perform well enough and we didn't rehearse at all, as my instrutor has strong faith on putting on spirit and things will just anyhow flow =.=
I got chance to speak Japanese, too, during my days in Vientiane, just to find out my Japanese sucks. Especially speaking. My listening is okay, able 2 catch up, since i watch anime every day.. but the speaking part.. really.. after all the years of learning the language, i only managed to produce some pieces of lame conversations, which all the simple yet grammatically wrong. Haiz.. really disappointed with myself.. in the end i'm half- assed in everything, i speak lame Chinese, my Japanese is still lousy and my English remains sucks. My Vietnamese starts to become weird, too.. Arg~~ may b i better go learn sign language bah~
Anyway, exepct the prolems occured here and there, it still can be considered a quite good trip, I managed to go shopping on my own without getting lost, and everything else seemed to move smoothly. The food was good, too and the trainings were interesting enough. Bangkok is as busy as ever and Vientiane is quite and peaceful. The whether in Vientiane was suprisingly nice, and the people are really sincere. At least i did enjoy myself ya..
Aiya,, how ah?? why recently so many bad things keep happening 2 me?? now i'm facing a great chance to reinstalling windows again...and now i'm on the edge of losing all my precious documents.. with tons of files scattering ard, another 20gb of music and all the software installed, seems that i hav to stay one whole night for this =.=
Then still hav friends problems.. Some ppl that hav almost lost in my memory now suddenly turned up.. yet some ppl who always there 4 me now start 2 disappear.. And my hand's injured again, badly that i thought it was broken or something.. and my internet's getting slower for no reason, too slow that i can't even check my emails, let alone complaining on my blog..
And my money problem's getting uglier again.. dad thought i still hav a few k in my saving that's y he was happily telling me 2 use that money 1st until he's back frm business trip.. yeah it's me who didn't dare 2 bring myself confessing 2 him that i've eaten all my money =.= now i dun hav a single cents in my bank accounts, all together..
Hopefully I'll b able 2 survive during my coming Thailand & Laos trip... Wondering what's waiting 4 me next... the only thing i know now is i'm definately having a loooooooong night 2nite...
Arrg dunno why i'm so unlucky recently =.= the aikido training yesterday was really good, and i was successfully avoided that morron but was so excited and over-confident when i tried to slam on shihonage.. so the result is my hand got injured badly.. can say it was terribly twisted =.= now i can't move or lift my hand up at all... so at the moment i just pray hard that it's not broken and will be able 2 recover soon. If not things would turn disaster since i'm having my trip to Laos & Thailand next week and my exams r coming soon.. since it's my left hand that got injured and i'm left-handed, it's pretty bad when it comes to daily activities.. i just realise i can still type relatively fast with one hand, thougth. may b use computer too much already, haha
